The Winner: 3 Backyards. This unbearably pretentious and self-indulgent wannabe art film presents us with a petty meltdown, Elias Koteas furrowing his brow, a random mystical white poodle and caterpillars. Did I mention the masturbating dog killer? I hated this movie – and it is still pissing me off.
The Worst Trend: People sitting in front of me texting and checking their email, flashing their screens and taking me out of the film.
Note: I don’t have a Worst Ten Movie list because, unlike professional critics, I don’t have to see every movie. I do see 75-100 new movies each year, but I try REALLY, REALLY HARD to avoid the bad movies. So my worst movie going experience is always either 1) on an airline flight when I see a movie that I normally wouldn’t; 2) a hyped art film that disastrously falls on its face and/or really pisses me off (The White Ribbon); or 3) something I find on cable TV while channel surfing (Paul Blart: Mall Cop). But usually, the culprit finds its way aboard a long airline flight. Not this year.